Dating An Officer In The Army – Whether you’re already in the military, want to join, or are interested in dating someone who is in the military, there’s a lot to go through. Besides keeping up with all the acronyms, jargon, and lifestyle changes, you’re probably wondering how does dating in the military actually work?
If you’re asking any of these questions, we’re here to give you the answers. So please grab your boots, put on your Kevlar, and answer each of these questions with numbers.
Dating An Officer In The Army
Oh, and if you’re looking for a place for military personnel to meet single women and men (in and out of the military), check out the links we have for you here.
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To the surprise of many, dating in the military is just like dating anywhere else. Even though the military is a little more demanding than other jobs, it is still a job. You may work longer hours, have more responsibilities and have to leave from time to time, but it’s still just a job.
We share it because just because you have a demanding job doesn’t mean you don’t have the right or ability to date like everyone else. During the holidays, you can still date. You can still have dinner, drinks, coffee, and spend time with a new lover or someone you’ve been dating for a long time.
Here’s the bottom line. Dating in the military is pretty much the same as how it works anywhere else. You may have to be a little more flexible when setting the date, but it works the same.
Yes, soldiers are allowed to date civilians, and so are other soldiers in the military. However, there are some limitations.
Original 1950s British Army Officer’s Collarless Shirt By ‘coles’
You may also want to consider not dating anyone in your unit, even if it is allowed. Why? Mixing work with fun can be a recipe for disaster. This is especially true with military jobs where you can’t just quit and work somewhere else if you drop out. If you want to avoid drama, don’t date anyone near your unit.
The real answer is neither! If the two of you are right for each other and you understand how military dating works, it might be a good idea! But there are times when dating a soldier might be a bad idea. Here are some examples (these are aimed at civilians):
Here’s the bottom line – dating during deployment is a bad thing. You must be away from your partner for more than a year. There is usually three months of training for deployment (often away from home), and then nine months on the bootstraps in their destination country.
And before you ask, no, you cannot continue with them. This is different from being assigned to a new assignment. These are the PCS steps, which in most cases you can follow.
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However, the exact details of how communications work depend on where they are deployed. If you go to a relatively busy place like Kuwait, you may be able to chat a lot, but the hours will be very different.
However, if they are deployed to a combat zone, you may not hear from them for weeks or months. Sometimes that’s the nature of the beast.
One of the most popular questions that comes up in military discussions is whether or not soldiers are good at relationships. And the answer is it depends. As with any profession, you can’t say that 100% of the people in a job are great or bad. Everything will be on a case by case basis.
That said, there are some conclusions and generalizations you can make that are often true. Soldiers are trained in respect, attention to detail, punctuality, and how to get the job done. If these qualities sound good to you, starting a relationship with a soldier might be a good idea.
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But if you’re someone who can’t keep things in order, black and white, organized, and always on time – you might have a hard time dating a soldier.
So, should you date someone in the military? This is up to you. Handle on a case by case basis. See them as individuals and not as soldiers. Would you date them if they weren’t in the military? If the answer is no, that’s a red flag. If the answer is yes, go for it! It was a Saturday in November when Deborah Colgate received a Facebook message from a man named Daniel Blackmon.
Colgate, 56, was recently separated and admittedly lonely, but remained fascinated by Blackmon. He was handsome, kind, and a colonel in the US Army. He asked about his family, what he did for a living, whether he had grandchildren. He told her how beautiful her smile was. They talked about their hobbies and interests, and within a few weeks Blackmon began to open up to her. He said his wife left him after trying to kill their son, Alvin. And because Blackmon said he was being deployed, Alvin stayed with a family friend in England. Meanwhile, Blackmon soon made it clear that his feelings for Colgate were growing stronger: He wanted to be with her, he said. He wants to marry her.
It wasn’t until Blackmon started asking Colgate for money that her daughter, Brandi, who was working at the bank at the time, sensed something was wrong. Blackmon tells Deborah that doctors have found a tumor in her son’s stomach and he urgently needs surgery. He said he couldn’t access his money because he was deployed, and asked Deborah if she could loan him a few thousand dollars.
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But what Brandi found when she looked for Daniel Blackmon was not what she expected: the real Daniel Blackmon, an Army colonel in Oklahoma, was happily married with children.
Col. Daniel Blackmon, commander of the 434th Field Artillery Brigade (Basic Combat Training) at Fort Sill, recently addressed some burning questions surrounding this year’s holiday block leave. (Fort Sill Public Affairs)
He and his mother would soon learn that they were two of hundreds, if not thousands, of people conned by people using Blackmon’s identity. Most of the profiles use Blackmon’s full name and photos that he previously shared on Twitter, although some just use other photos and names. The selfie is their profile photo; they tore up photos he posted online in his uniform and shared them with the women they spoke to.
Blackmon – who is real – estimates there have been hundreds of fake accounts using his name and photo on various social media sites since he was alerted to the first fake account in his name in 2014. If there were online dating sites in the world, he said, he’d probably have an account there.
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He wasn’t the only member of the military whose likeness was used to trick unsuspecting people – usually women – into thinking they were in a friendship, or even a romantic relationship, with the person behind the hoax. The top US general in Afghanistan once said officials had discovered more than 700 fake profiles in his name. And other high-profile people, such as former Defense Secretary Jim Mattis and former Joint Chiefs Chairman Joseph Dunford, have reported similar imitations. Military romance scams are so common that the Army Criminal Investigation Division has an entire web page dedicated to telling people how to recognize and report them.
In a way, this isn’t much different from other popular scams of the past, such as the infamous “Nigerian prince” emails asking for bank information of people who still make hundreds of thousands of dollars a year, according to ADT Security Services. But military romance scams in particular reveal a knowledge gap between American citizens and their military. For example, troops deployed overseas will always have access to their money. And even if for some strange reason they didn’t, would they really ask a stranger to send them thousands of dollars?
But like the Nigerian Prince scam – or the robocall scam urging people to extend car warranties – the best way to combat it is to make sure everyone knows it’s a scam.
“We just have to do our best to highlight it, and the more you highlight it, the less likely they are,” Blackmon said of fraudsters. “And they’ll move on to something else. But not this one.”
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Get help from the person who wants to turn it off. One of the tricks that fraudsters use is a trick like this. Most people realize that’s not true, but people will believe what they want to believe. I myself have better fashion sense than this but…Day 4 asked @Meta to do the right thing. pic.twitter.com/Dc3jtciXXI— 🇮🇩🦅Daniel Blackmon💥💥 (@UncleRedLeg) January 11, 2022
On the other end of the instant messaging window was an American service member. They were deployed on a secret mission, or maybe one of them
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