How To Be A Good Christian Wife – In last week’s post, I told you about my struggle to be a submissive wife and how God answered my prayers on how to be a better wife with the words: Y.E.S. Honey, i.e. harvest, e
And pray Today I want to talk a little about the second part of the brief: What does it mean to lift up our husbands? But before talking about its meaning, I think it is useful to discuss it
How To Be A Good Christian Wife
When I started looking for opposite words for height, I realized that if I’m honest, I was guilty of those things in my marriage. I don’t know that I “insult” my husband, but in our interactions, sometimes I express a disdainful or contemptuous nature towards him; We have three children and our lives are very busy In the hustle and bustle of life, my kids get most of my energy and patience and time and she gets the rest.
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I rarely consider how I speak to him or how my words come across I’m often in survival mode, going from one project or activity to another obligation, so what I say to my husband and how I say it comes out, and I’m sure it sometimes comes out wrong.
The words “suppression” also strike a chord Don’t get me wrong – I don’t abuse my husband But if I could collect all the words I’ve said about him over the years and arrange them in a barrel, would there be more positive than negative? I honestly don’t think I need to form positive words to acknowledge His power and the blessings He has brought to our family, except for thanksgiving or birthdays or anniversaries. It is not just a practice
So I feel that if I don’t build him up as before, many of the remaining words will serve to put him down Even our thoughts count Oops! We may be careful not to discriminate against our husbands, but what about your thoughts about your husband? Luke 6:45 tells us, out of the heart the mouth speaks When our thoughts about our husband are negative, our words and the tone of those words reflect that inner attitude.
So after I admitted to you how bad I was at raising my husband, I wanted to switch gears and stay positive, so I came up with three ways to raise your husband.
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Raising your husband must begin with training your mind to honor God. This may take some practice; Old habits die hard! It is our human nature to find fault and track the ways in which we have been wronged But 1 Corinthians 1:1 tells us that love does not admit wrong. It is important to practice binding negative thoughts and replacing them with positive thoughts about our husband Another practical way to do this is to say a prayer of thanksgiving for your husband, list the things you are thankful for, and make it a habit to be aware of those good things.
“Finally, brothers and sisters, think about whatever is true, whatever is excellent, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is beautiful, whatever is beautiful, whatever is admirable – whatever is excellent or praiseworthy.” – Philippians 4: ((NIV) “We tear down all arguments and arguments set up against the wisdom of God, and we bring every thought captive to the obedience of Christ.” – 2 Corinthians 10: ((NIV) 2) Lift him up before Him. |
Once you learn about the positive qualities your husband has, it’s a natural transition to voice those thoughts in his presence. It may seem forced or awkward at first, but I think it will be a blessing to you and your husband! You may already be an expert at this, but for those of us who need practice, don’t give up or get discouraged if it doesn’t go the way you hope or your husband doesn’t notice.
Some husbands aren’t approached by direct words of affirmation, and that’s okay Remember, we are doing this to honor the Lord, not for the results it produces! But regardless of your husband’s immediate outward reaction, you can bet that the inner changes taking place within you will have a long-term impact on your relationship.
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“Therefore encourage one another and build one another up…” – 1 Thessalonians:11:1 ((NIV) 3.) Exalt him above others.
If you have children, they can be a safe testing ground for speaking positively about your husband to others If picking her up in front of you is a little intimidating, picking her up in front of others can be even more so! But don’t let fear stop you from talking to your husband and about life in your marriage
“God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.” – 2 Timothy :: (NKJV) “The tongue has the power of life and death…” – Proverbs 18:21a (NIV)
If you have young children, “Didn’t Daddy do a good job washing the car?” One can begin by saying this or “Doesn’t your dad look good in that suit?” When he was within earshot When he’s not around, you can make him high; Talking well with your children about your husband is a powerful way to positively shape their view of their father and marriage. When you’re in a group of friends and the conversation turns to complaints about your spouse, be careful not to get involved, and try to use the conversation as a springboard to turn the topic into something positive, like “but you know.” What, I think all our boys will do very well…”
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Let me be clear: I do none of these things well Not until now. But I really, really want to start! So, if you join me next week to improve our husbands, I’d love for us to start a conversation in comments about our success stories, and our frustrations and failures. That’s what Christian Christianity is about – sharing our struggles, then joining arms as we move forward
Jaime Hampton lives in South Central Alaska with her husband and three children. She is a Christian author and co-host of the Praying Christian Women podcast She also enjoys camping with her family, roasting (and drinking!) coffee and the crazy life of being a hockey mom You can connect with Jaime at www.jaimehampton.com
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