How To Choose An Egg Donor – GoStork reached out to me to share my thoughts and explore new free one-stop platforms for potential donor parents.
I think this is why infertility can be traumatic; because when something reminds me of a traumatic event, my body and mind are literally transported back to that time and place. egg donor Sit next to the man I married, turn on the computer and look at young (beautiful) women together.
How To Choose An Egg Donor
I opened a bottle of wine before going in and said “come on girl, let’s surf the internet for hot chicks!” I said. Humor has always been my most valuable coping mechanism for dealing with the most unpleasant moments in life. If someone had told me we would be doing this 5 years into our marriage, I wouldn’t have believed them.
Your Guide To Picking An Egg Donor, Sperm Donor, And Gestational Carrier
Our fertility clinic gave us five egg donor agency websites to review and check. FIVE. I can barely keep track of two email addresses, let alone five different usernames and passwords. This process was already strong enough, and now I have to manage an army of young beautiful women and remember who I saw, where I saw and what I liked.
We tested the first entry and set our search criteria to filter the results. Blond hair. Blue eyed. Height 5’6″ – 5’9″. Pretty simple, right? Hmm. NO. I just wanted a few photos of perfect donor candidates, but what we found was a library of EVERY pregnant, blue-eyed young woman there could be in the land of donor eggs.
The profiles were dense. Photos of all ages, photos of their parents, their children, whether they have children, their favorite movies, dietary restrictions, medical history, bra size, religious beliefs, sexual orientation, blood type, you name it. They even named it after their favorite color. I was pressed in here to make sure our donor was trained and had straight teeth, and now you’re talking about colors? What is Sesame Street? We are very sorry. I spent hours scanning profiles. The search and search for our “chosen”. I pull out my white hair one by one.
I basically had to exempt my husband from the process and take the wheel myself. This was too much for me.
Choosing A Donor
It was hard enough trying to control my own emotions, let alone worrying about whether he was upset or not.
(Thunder didn’t care, but of course I did. These girls were HOT. HOT. HOT!). Believe it or not, he was actually weirder than me.
Critical doesn’t even begin to describe my mood. #743 was sweet but her smile was very sad. #652 looked good on paper, but not good enough in profile. #786 looked great, but my GPA wasn’t that high and God knows I’m no genius. He also listed
Was her favorite book, and I had to draw the line at vampire romance novels. House. Number 689 was close to perfect, but decided to transfer to graduate school at the last minute. Oh, and her fashion sense wasn’t exactly what I expected either; There was a red sweater situation that I couldn’t get out of.
How To Choose An Egg Donor?
I was getting upset over every little thing and I was very upset about it. Who am I to judge? I can’t understand why an infertile couple in my 20s would judge me based on my bio and photos. I can only draw a picture of it. “Oh, let’s move on to #342. A girl who still has her baby teeth, quits college sports, joins a riot, drops out of school, gives her boyfriend to Judge Judy, and works part time at Hooters.” I worked at Hooters for two weeks. I got fired for not shaving the shrimp for him.
I finally decided to create a spreadsheet of what I had in mind. I was so lost in the search that donors were confused.
I recently learned about GoStork.com, a free resource that brings all egg donor sites together in one central location, and I really wish I had a resource like that when I was searching. They are the largest free online database and have over 10,000 egg donors in their database!
The GoStork platform offers all the information you need about the egg donors you are considering in one place – such as age, appearance, photos (some even have videos!!!), education, race/ethnicity, religion, location, money, etc. previous donation records or proven fertility, medical history (their own and their family’s), etc.
Day Fiancé: Daniele And Yohan Choose An Egg Donor
They also have a really cool comparison tool where you can see egg donors side by side (aka the spreadsheet I spent hours creating) and get there in a click/second. YES. YES.
I don’t know of any other site or resource that does this! Lots of emails, phone calls, etc. to get price breakdowns from different donor organizations. I remember having to send it in, adding it to my IVF fee from my RE, and having to update it line by line in my spreadsheet. GoStork gives you the exact “Travel Value”… (Wait for that….)
You can also provide services to providers, egg donors, etc. They also have a direct messaging tool where they can easily message to ask questions about or set up an appointment (call or zoom) with them. ALL provider calendars are integrated with GoStork!
What am I looking for? Is there a standard I must meet? How can I find the “right egg donor”? Is there a guidebook on this subject?
How To Choose Your Egg Donor With Cryos International
The short answer was no. He told me to think about choosing a donor like choosing a spouse. He said there had to be a spark or some kind of connection. He assured me that I would understand when I found “the one.”
Excuse me, how? How can I feel about a young girl I’ve never met?
After hours, days, and weeks, we finally found “the one.” She looked like she could be my twin sister and she was available! The fruit is blessed (literally).
The doctor told me that the donor had the same behaviors as me. He talked like me, laughed like me. Is this the link I’m looking for? We knew we were taking a risk since she was a first time donor, but I had feelings for this girl (at least that’s what I thought). He must be the only one! We chose him as our donor, signed the legal contracts and started the process. A love affair began but unfortunately ended in separation. The day before egg retrieval was scheduled, most of her eggs disappeared. Poof, gone. We don’t know what it was, but it wasn’t him after all. We were heartbroken.
Egg Donation Faqs [infographic]
After a million ugly screams and wasting a lot of time going through the process, we decided to try a new doctor. I’ll never forget what she said to me when I told her: “You don’t need to fall in love with your donor or find your twin, Victoria. You just need to find someone to be your egg. Healthy and fertile.” “
Hmm, that was a theory I could get behind. It definitely seemed less stressful, but it also seemed a little too “businesslike” for this life-changing process. So I decided to follow his advice, but in my own way. I would focus my energy more on the healthy and fertile, less on the twin, but I would look for one or two things that I felt connected to.
The second donor we chose was definitely not my twin. He looked like he could be a second or third cousin, perhaps. MAYBE. But she was very fertile, had a proven track record, and had a very clean medical and family history. I didn’t feel a spark or a love connection. He had a similar heritage to me – German and English – and I thought this might be a special bond I could share with my future child, and a way to connect him to my side of the family beyond genetics.
I didn’t feel the spark or connection of love, but this is the woman who helped me become a mother. It didn’t look exactly like me, but its egg became the love of my life, my only love. My wife is Florence.
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And honestly, there’s no need for it. Your child and your partner play this role. All you need is a healthy seed that your soil can develop and grow. Your body contains everything your baby needs to grow into a beautiful flower. And it takes years and years for that flower to grow and be watered with YOUR love.
If I were to do it all over again I would definitely use GoStork. This would definitely save me a ton of stress, time (and wine).
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